The Gains of Workshop

After the workshop on Mon, I really gald that I got a lot of useful feedback from my three groupmates. My story was about my mother who is also my first teacher, she helped me to improve my English and also built my confidence by reading after dinner everyday a few years ago. And it was my true story that catched others' eyes and they thought I gave good details to show that how my mother was important to my life by the way of slient, and I even didn't realize before,also the part of reading by my mother attracted others, and they believed it was interesting and unique. Also someone said I used two tense in my writing: present and past. I know that is the part which I always did bad, coz sometimes when I was writing, I always forgot to keep the tense same through the whole paper, I will change the tense in my essay to make them coherent. In addition, I seperated some paragraph which should be together as one, that meaned I did keep the same main claim in the same paragraph or I put the content which shared the same idea in two parts of my paper, that was another part that I need to pay attention to and also I thought I need more transactions between different paragraphs, it is important for the reader to follow my experience. I will reorganize my paper and put the seperate part together or make some paragraphs seperate. I really appreciated what my instructor and my groupmates done for making my paper better. Thanks